Halloween now and then...

Helaman had his Halloween party and parade at preschool today. He feels that it's very important to be a pumpkin every year (and Isaiah, too) but they don't make pumpkin costumes big enough for 4-year-olds (nor patterns for that matter). So we were all up late last night creating one. Well, Omar did the actual sewing, and he didn't think my cutting was good enough, so he re-did that also (if you know Omar...)

Nick is here visiting from Arizona and we kept him up all night talking to us while we worked in the kitchen so he couldn't go to bed. It was lots of fun!

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We have big plans for Halloween, tambien. We're going to Gridley! We're leaving tomorrow after work. We're going trick-or-treating with Omar's cousins on Friday and we're really excited to see them. And then just play for the weekend. Helaman is really excited. Okay, we're all really excited.

6 Quirks

I've been tagged by Katie, who I am really excited is blogging, so I'm being a good sport and participating...

Here are the rules: "MY UNSPECTACULAR QUIRKS"

1. Link to the person who tagged you


2. Mention the rules on your blog


3. Tell 6 unspectacular quirks about you


4. Tag 6 following bloggers by linking to them


5. Leave a comment on each of the tagged blogger's blogs letting them know they've been tagged.

My 6 Unspectacular Quirks

1. I am a germ-a-phobe. As a mom, my biggest struggle is staying calm with anything germy and grossy that goes wrong.


2. I don't like lots of noise. I'm going to need one of those background noise filtering hearing aids when I grow up (though I'd enjoy one right now).


3. I almost always skip to the end of a book about half way through, because I can't wait to see how it ends. Then I'll go back and read the rest of the book.


4. I almost always finish a book within a few days for the same reason as above.


5. Although my dad said when I grew up and had to pay for the hot water I would take short showers, I still take long ones whenever I have the time.


6. I love to be right. Always.

Now I'm going to break the rules and tag anyone who wants to play. It's fun to get to know my friends better, so if you have the time and inclination, I'd love to read about your quirks.

Voting my Conscious

A friend had this posted on her blog. It was beautiful, and I wanted to share. From Catholic vote:



May the Lord bless us to all vote our conscious and protect our families, and God's family.

Desert Empire Fair

When we first arrived at this tiny little fair, we almost turned around and left. But we ended up having lots of fun and were glad we stayed. They let Isaiah and a parent ride free on everything, which would never happen at a bigger fair. They let Helaman go on any of the rides with an adult, there were no height restrictions (he LOVED the squirrel cages). And there were no long ride lines, which was also great.I had seen pictures online of a past fair and thought it looked like a bunch of little dust bowl kids. Not too far off... at least on the dust part.

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Big Little Helaman

Helaman is getting so big. I love watching the way his mind works. This video was all him, no one was helping him with the answers.



Here's some other fun Helaman getting big stuff lately:

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Helaman is 4 *Now with Pictures!!!

Helaman had his 4th birthday on Saturday. It was an all day family fun day. I wish it was someones birthday more often!

We got up and went to donuts and yard sales in the morning. Then we let him watch some t.v. and had lunch on the golf course on base. He and Isaiah loved watching the golfers and running around in the grass while they ate.

We came home and opened presents early because we wanted him to get to use his helmet. Grandma Elsa and Grandpa Luis both sent some birthday money so we were able to buy him a motorcycle helmet. He hasn't been able to go on 4-wheeler rides with daddy since we moved here because he needed a helmet. After presents daddy and Helaman went on a loooong ride and then mommy and Helaman went for a walk and explored the desert across from our house while daddy took Isaiah for a ride. Then we cleaned up and went to the pizza place with all the games and Helaman played in the balls for a couple of hours while daddy and I spent his tokens. After that we came home and had cake. Helaman was too full of pizza, and only wanted ice cream. This he still didn't eat, but istead filled with birthday candles and wasted. Good thing it was his birthday! Then we let him stay up late after we put Isaiah to bed to build the garbage truck that Grandma Maggie and Grandpa Steve sent.

When I asked him what his favorite part of the day was he said, "Everything!"

Happy Birthday sweet boy!

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Dressed Up

Helaman: Mommy, do you know when getting dressed up is?
Mommy: What?
Helaman: It's when you take off all your clothes, put on different clothes, and go to a meeting.

(Just a deep thought he had while riding his bike in slow circles on our back patio tonight.)

Things I've Learned About Mothering Lately

The hardest and the best parts of my life have to do with being a mother. I love my boys so much, but I'm also often frustrated, short-tempered, and selfish. I have my moments where I know I'm doing a good job, but all too often I also know I'm falling short.

My parenting has come under a microscope since we moved to Ridgecrest. I didn't realize how much of that burden I shared with so much family around. Now it's just me and the boys, all mommy all the time. I've become a lot more aware and have begun to parent a lot more consciously--and I am very aware of my shortcomings.

As I've struggled to become a more Christ-like mother, I've learned some things lately I want to record for myself. This is going to be a very public list of what feel like my private pitfalls, but maybe someone else out there struggles with the same things I do...

In any event, here's my current list:

1. Nurture.
   When I've thought about being a stay-home-mom and what that means for the division of responsibility in our family, it was something really vague like this: Omar goes to work and makes the money, and I stay home and take care of stuff here. I cook, I clean, I take care of the boys, I make sure everyone eats, I buy groceries and schedule play dates and do the laundry, read to my babies, play games, clean, clean clean.
   
   A couple of weeks ago I was reading through the world-wide leadership training that came in the Ensign. In President Packer's address he talked specifically about each part of the Proclamation on the Family. As I read
   

   By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children.

   
   I suddenly realized I had my division wrong. Not completely, but just enough.
   
   Frequently, when I lost my patience with my little ones, it was because I was so focused on cleaning and cooking and the long to-do list I had in my head, and they were making it take longer or not get done at all. Really, my focus needed to be on nurturing them, and everything else I had piled on was supposed to be part of taking care of that, not the end in itself. When I shifted my focus to nurturing them, it made a huge difference in my attitude, our happiness, and the Spirit in our home.
   
   That's probably obvious, or should have been, but it wasn't to me.


2. Leadership
   Omar and I were asked to speak in Sacrament Meeting last month on the topic of Christ-like leadership. At the time of the assignment, I thought it was kind of a funny topic, but as I prepared my talk, I discovered that the Lord was aware of my struggles as a mother, and had sent me exactly the topic I needed to grow and find comfort.
   
   Before this talk I hadn't thought about what I was doing in terms of leadership. I have had a lot of experience in leadership roles in my young life, and I felt like I was pretty good at taking charge and getting things done. However, I had missed two important points. Although intellectually I know that we are supposed to follow Christ in everything we do, I had never thought about it in terms of leadership. And somehow in all my busy day-to-day I had forgotten to think of my role as a mother as being that of a leader. As I studied for my talk, both of the these points became key in my personal growth.
   
   I read may good articles on the subject as I was preparing, but one by President Kimball called Jesus: the Perfect Leader seemed to speak directly to my soul. President Kimball focused on 5 points that I applied to motherhood as my talk. They were:
   
   
   
   1. Christ led from a place of fixed principles.
   
   
   2. He was unfailingly understanding and loving
   
   
   3. He was selfless
   
   
   4. He delegated meaningful responsibility
   
   
   5. He always used his time wisely
   
   
   
   Fixed Principles
   Because he was on solid ground, he was able to lead from a position of strength. This inspired our family to set a family home evening to talk about what the principles were we would run our family on, and establish some basic family rules. No when someone is violating one of the four rules, it's much easier to talk about the problem and how to fix it.
   
   This idea also helped me to parent with a purpose. Once I had thought about this, it was easier for me to try and think about my reactions, and how I planned our time, and what we did in terms of our real goal: of being a forever family and following Christ. It gave me a framework in which to think about the millions of decisions and moments that had seemed so overwhelming every day. I wasn't just reacting, I was leading. (Or that was the idea. Still working on that...)
   
   And because Christ operated from fixed principles his was a leadership of "come follow me." Do what I do, not do what I say. Don't yell at each other, don't leave messes, be kind, help, eat your vegetables, no cookies before dinner.... I need to do all those things better, too.
   
   Understanding & Loving
   Christ perfectly loved everyone he came in contact with. He could listen without being condescending, and he could reprove his disciples and maintain a good relationship because they knew He loved them.
   
   He was also perfectly patient. I LOVED this quote from President Kimball:
   

   Jesus saw sin as wrong but also was able to see sin as springing from deep and unmet needs on the part of the sinner. This permitted him to condemn the sin without condemning the individual.

   
   My kids are never being bad because they are evil and want to follow Satan (very few people ever do things for this reason--including me). When I focus on the needs behind the behavior, I get a lot further than just trying to correct the behavior. If only I could remember this all the time... When I do I finally understand how disciple and punishment are not the same thing.
   
   Selfless
   Some days it feels like this is my biggest struggle. President Kimball said selfish leaders, "make harsh demands of life and others in order to meet their demands." I want things done a certain way, and I am too often harsh demanding that they be that way.
   
   He also said manipulative leaders are selfish. And that, "One of the problems with manipulative leadership is that it does not spring from a love of others but from a need to use them. Such leaders focus on their own needs and desires and not on the needs of others." I can definitely feel that truth in that as I try to manipulate obedience.
   
   And the final nail in my coffin of selfishness, selfish leaders make decision, "Seeking to stop the present pain, creating even greater difficulty and pain later." How many times do I just give in to a fit, or hand out a cookie, or...
   
   Keeping a long-term perspective is difficult, and certainly does require present pain a lot of the time. Being unselfish in my parenting is a constant, and necessary struggle.
   
   Sharing Responsibility
   The whole idea behind leadership is that you are trying to help people grow and get somewhere better. Christ gave his followers important and specific assignments for their growth. It's a lot easier to do everything myself. It's much easier to just clean the toy room the way I want it to be, or run family night myself, or make everyone's beds. But to lead the Christ, I have to delegate and teach.
   
   He also patiently helped when those he gave assignments to struggled. Like when the apostles couldn't cast out the devil in a suffering person. He didn't go do it for them, though he certainly could of. Instead he told them how to correct what they had done wrong and do it again.
   
   Wise with my Time
   As I honestly reflected, I realized a lot of my stress came from using my time unwisely. President Kimball said leisure to renew and reflect was good. Wasting time wasn't. As I try to follow the Savior and actively parent and fill my days with not time wasting activities, I get a lot more fit into a day, am more patient because I have a greater portion of the Spirit, and I'm less frustrated. Again, I wish I could say that I now never waste any time and have become perfect. Alas, that is not the case.


3. Loving v. Problems
   As I was watching the Sunday morning session of General Conference, something President Monson said hit me with great force,
   

   Never let a problem to be solved become more important than a person to be loved.

   
   I realized that in my impatient disciplining, that was often what I was doing. I was focusing on the problem instead of the little one I needed to be loving. This phrase runs through my head a million times a day now, when things are spilled, or someone is disobeying, or bed time needs to happen. It's given me a way to constantly remind myself what really matters, my boys and loving them. The problems needs to be dealt with, but not in a way that undermines loving them.
   
   I'm so grateful for an inspired prophet.


4. The Atonement
   As I become more and more aware of my weaknesses I also become more grateful for my Savior. I am daily reliant on His grace and mercy. If I keep doing my best, despite all of my huge errors, through his amazing atonement He will make up what I lack. And because of His grate love and sacrifice I can fall down daily, turn to Him in repentance, and try again.

And that's what I've been learning lately.

Tagged: 8 Things

I've been tagged. So in the spirit of good sportsmanship, here are some very boring things about me...

8 TV shows that I love to watch

1. The Office
2. House
3. 30 Rock
4. Life
5. SNL
6. Designed to Sale
7. Divine Design
8. CNN

8 favorite restaurants

1. Red Robin
2. Costa Vida
3. Chipotle
4. Applebees
5. Tempanyaki
6. Matsu
7. Hoola's
8. Casa Lupe Deli

8 things that happened yesterday

1. We missed music class
2. We had our own music class at home
3. Omar and I watched and couldn't finish watching the debate where they say nothing over and over
4. We had a dance party in the living room before family prayer
5. We went to McDonald's for dinner and discovered Monopoly is back! (Now it officially feels like Fall)
6. I went grocery shopping by myself after the kids were in bed :)
7. Isaiah went to bed without nursing for the second night in a row
8. Helaman made a really cool parking garage that turned into a really cool tractor car wash with his duplos

8 things I'm looking forward to

1. Omar having Monday off while Helaman is at preschool and Isaiah is napping. Alone?
2. Going to stake temple day in a couple of weeks
3. Getting my piano cord in the mail (thanks Chris!)
4. Getting all caught up with my pictures
5. Riding bikes to the park tonight
6. Making Helaman's pumpkin costume
7. Designing a flier for choir practice on Sunday.
8. Voting

8 things on my wish list

1. Air condioting in the van
2. The majic bullet
3. Shelves for the toy room
4. Wheat grinder
5. A cadre of skilled doctors moving to Ridgecrest
6. A house on the beach (while I'm wishing....)
7. A haircut
8. Safe kids

8 people I tag

1. Amanda
2. Emily
3. Greta (write something on your dang blog!)
4. Trina
5. Michelle
6. Donna
7. Debbie
8. Melanie

Economic Crisis

I've been trying to wrap my head around the economic crisis. This is the best explanation I've found about how we got into this mess. If there are any other news-a-holics out there, this is for you.

• Glenn Beck: What Happened?



• Glenn Beck: What's Coming?



• Glenn Beck: What Can I Do to Prepare?

Same Sex Marriage

This broke my heart, and scared me to death!

Isaiah is 1!

My sweet Isaiah turned one last week. I can't believe he's already so big. And yet it seems like he's always been with us, too.

At 1 Isaiah weighs 19. 5 pounds and is long and skinny. He walks, runs, jumps, climbs, spins, and is just generally active and adventurous.

He loves animals, real or stuffed, of all kinds and wants to touch and hug them whenever possible. He's not afraid of anything (which is both good and very worrisome).

He has become a total daddy's boy, following Omar around everywhere, doing whatever Omar does, and calling him all day while he's at work. He copies everything Helaman does, too. It's sometimes funny, but not so much when big brothers are not being the best example.

He is talking so much it's hard to list the word he says, but it's so cute, I wish I could record every moment. My favorite is that every bird in the world is a duck right now. It cracks me up.

He never slows down, you only know he's tired because he starts falling over a lot. :) He goes to sleep without nursing (thank goodness) by shutting his own door, using his pointer finger to turn on the rain noise and music and then blowing kisses out the door. He has finally started sleeping through the night, but still tries to get into my bed whenever he can.

Here's the pictures of his birthday party. He can blow very well, but he couldn't quite get that blowing was the things to do with the candle. So I had to help with that afterall.

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